We began the evening in an interesting situation. The russian, Vlad, his oddly stereotypical effeminate Asian “friend”, Slinky, and myself were all within the bizarre teleportation room with the seven idols. We decided that we should probably head back to the cave system we originally came in through. I decided to go last to try and see if the others could hear me chant to check the range of the room in relation to the cave system.

Once the others departed, I proceeded to chant my prayers to Cthulhu, broadcasting my faith to those around me. Well, that was when all hell broke loose, or so I believed. The very framework of the room awoke and started to wig out. The stone elder beasts that represent the teleportation devices arose and started to circle me. One of them opened up and spewed some spawn that I could not make out. The effects around me were both titillating and terrifying, although somehow there was an emptiness in the overall vision. The chaos continued for several minutes with the circling beings becoming more surreal as time passed. Eventually, the beings coalesced into a small room that surrounded me with a strange face as the ceiling. The walls were smooth and the face was not unlike the inside of a voodoo mask. Indeed, not where I expected to be when I woke up this morning.

I pondered my situation for several minutes when a ominous voice asked my why I summoned it. Not quite what I was expecting since I figured that should I ever actually accomplish summoning a Great One that they would be quite happy. (I hope) I touched the ceiling to see if it was an actual illusion or not. My hand burst into flame and it consumed my flesh down to the bone, but I felt no actual pain. Very interesting indeed. I was tempted to touch it further to let the entity consume me, but something was not right. Unlike some of my previous encounters, this did not convey the omniscient presence I felt in Glasgow, nor the maleficence of the mask. This was something weaker. A dull force that was somehow manipulating me.

At this point, I decided that I had enough and focused some of my energy to my surrounding area and realized my blessings of Cthulhu had expanded and I now was able to project dark tentacles that could consume my surroundings. The tentacles quickly dismembered my prison and revealed the hoax. A trickster was sitting on a brazier manipulating my surroundings and apparently my nervous system because my hand now hurt like nothing I ever felt before. Fuck, it really was melted down to the bone. Struggling to maintain consciousness through the pain, I blasted the asshole on the brazier, who had also established a force shield around himself. The brazier was blown away and he was hurt a bit. I continued and launched an burst of pure chaos at dickhead but somehow he was able to absorb the power and reflect it back at me. Ok, I do pack a punch.

The strange fellow then surrendered, although I think at this point I was far more fucked up then he was. We talked for a minute and he seemed pretty unconcerned about what I had so say and was more focused on my religious views. Sigh, small-minded people are always difficult. At some point in the conversation I mentioned that we were hired by Professor Levels son. The dude went ape shit and took off through the portal. I followed and met up with my fellows who also tried to stop him. After several vain attempts, I realized we would not be able to stop him, so I just talked to him telepathically. Ok, this was one fucked up dude. Seriously, how does someone get like that? In the end, psycho boy hauled ass back to the Levels Corp.

Several days later, the entire crew met back in what was left of Johannesburg. It looked like a war had broken out. The city was leveled and most of the inhabitants were dead. The place was pretty much a smoking crater. We debated what to do for a bit but finally decided on traveling to see if Levels was still there, and if we were lucky maybe see the new fellow rip the spine out of that asshole Levels. We made our way closer and witnessed several who seemed to be associated with the military. They let us pass and we made our way to one of the few remaining buildings, the headquarters of Levels Corp. Of the original 30 plus floors, only six were left. Several of us picked up weapons and clips for the orichalcum laced bullets. (Personally, I just want the orichalcum.) After a couple of futile attempts to find our way upstairs due to a massive number of booby traps, a small robot showed up and led us up to the general who we spoke to at the end of the last mission.

The general told us we were no longer under their employ and all the folders were destroyed. Well, at least some good news today.

It turns out the general guy was kind of in charge and he explained that the guy I had released was in fact the original super created via orichalcum. For some reason he was “special”, and had the ability to blow up in a thermonuclear explosion when he “dies”, absorb any supers who die in the explosion, and walk away more powerful than when he started. Isn’t that fucking quaint! The general also explained that we were in a room that nullified most of our powers. Well, this just gets better and better.

We tried several times to blow through the walls but all those efforts failed. I had Vlad rip the arms off of the robot who had sealed us in while we were talking to the general. I started to re-open the floor where we entered, but as I was doing this, a massive hole appeared in the center of the room that sucked the general out. The Newly Improved Original Boy appeared snarling with a newly vaulted ego and a snappy new haircut. He almost looked menacing, almost invoked a sense of fear, and almost made us worried. Truly an awe-inspiring individual. Maybe we should refer to him as “Almost, Kinda Guy”.

A couple of issues though:

  • So what if they ripped up my folder, where is Brown Jenkin? I still need to find that fuck Levels!
  • May need to look up a new drug on the market. I hear Diazepam, also called Valium, is a powerful sedative. If we can get enough we may be able to put Newly Improved Original Boy into a stupor where we can put him into a state of hibernation.
  • I wonder what it will cost to have some voodoo witch doctor fix my hand? This is really inhibiting my sex life.
  • Apparently my favorite empanada stand got destroyed, now I need to find a new place. Life sucks!


Broken & Bound SpaceHerpe